気体化する
by CelestialAngelofSorrow
Summary: The winds that are swept through this prideful city carry an innocence of fading life, that no one seems to catch nor acknowledge; it is an arrogance that could not so lightly cost a life. Kuchiki Byakuya was a man of notable dignity, who lived cursed as his loved ones die too soon; it was only a matter of time before irony shattered everything. oneshot; seen on my bya rptumblr


_The brevity of life is a fact of existence that is not often speculated upon. It is a looming darkness in the back of everyone's mind, which with time slowly creeps larger as age moves forward. Shinigami are drilled to know that death is just a mistake away and an absolute certainty, and in battle one must conquer that fear continuously, accepting it and defeating its impact._

_That is one of the many things Kuchiki Byakuya had easily learned, after his first battle._

_Up until now, there was only one time in which he struggled with that fear subconsciously; and as a result of that battle, both him and Kurosaki Ichigo barely came out alive._

_Byakuya's eyes widen in disbelief as his own bankai is stolen from him._

_This was not just any Shinigami however; this was a man of extraordinary strength, heir of the Kuchiki Clan, and powerful captain of the Gotei 13, whose belief in justice remain undefeated by the will of any others. He was a cold, intelligent and apathetic man who was raised for nothing short of greatness. The progress of Byakuya's power was only interrupted when he lost his wife too soon, and afterwards lost his emotion along the way._

_Renji is about to call for bankai; his captain displays a rare yell to stop, saving his lieutenant the loss of his own zanpakutou. _

_The sixth squad captain, facing the image of his deceased beloved everyday, has only ever shown hesitance with Rukia, really. The promise to protect had always boggled him slightly, for never before had he actually had something to protect other than his pride. Still, he did his absolute best to keep her safe. And safe is where he kept her._

_That slow bond between them, however, is the key to Byakuya's fear. Believing his opponent's logic was folly, he imagines the lively face of his little sister…His skeletal, dead little sister._

_He is stabbed through the stomach in an unforgivable moment of surprise._

'…_What is his power?'_

_Byakuya can hear Renji's screams in the distance, and in that split second, everything slows. It is unbearably cold, all of a sudden. He can feel his limbs grow limp, that blade that ripped right through him; that seemed to shatter his pride._

_Too many thoughts ran throughout his mind at once. The captain could not help but think that death was an impossibility for him right now. It would be irresponsible of him to leave his clan leaderless, without an heir. He would be an awful brother to leave his sister without a closer family again, subjected to the cruel scrutiny of the elders. What kind of captain was he, to leave his faithful lieutenant without a taichou?_

_Grinding his teeth, he pushed his arm against the ground as he struggled to get up, to even move a muscle._

'_Move, come on…get up, and kill him!'_

…

'_Damnit!'_

_He gave his coldest glare at the cursed enemy, as the sight of Renji sweeping Zabimaru down upon As Nodt met his gaze._

_It may have been the toughest thing Byakuya has ever done, to get up on his feet in that moment. Senbonzakura was held weakly in his limp hands, but he still kept standing; he couldn't give up now. Facing his enemy one last time, he takes a deep breath that is incredibly difficult to draw in. For a flicker of a moment, he fears it will be his last. The once thought infallible sixth squad captain is thrown into despair, despair greater than any other in his life._

_All of the moments in which he gazed up at the moon, for every second he wished he could hold Hisana in his arms, just one last time, in every painful memory in which he could recall his loved ones dying too soon…it all came down to this. This one last time he would face his enemy with dignity, while his very own zanpakutou was being used against him. In the corner of his eye, Rukia turns away and is thrown down by her enemy._

_The cursed White Knight of the city currently faces the harshest trials of a Shinigami._

_He apologized to Senbonzakura, whom he was unable to protect from this monster. A shudder ran through his body when there was no response. The next thing he knew, cherry blossoms he once so perfectly controlled were being thrust into his body against his will. The small blades cut through his chest, ripping internal organs along the way before escaping out of his back. Some scraped past his face, whipping with an intense speed that he knew all too well. To think he has been doing this on a regular basis to his own enemies for decades without a second thought._

'…_So this…is what it feels like…"_

_It was the price of that certain ignorance, the irony of everything; such a cruel fate._

_At this moment, Byakuya's steel grey eyes finally dim black. He knows now that he will not be making it out alive._

_That same despair grows deep within his soul. This time, he failed. Kuchiki Byakuya in his last moments felt failure. For the ones he loved, for the bonds he never took the time to appreciate; in that moment it was clear, and he knew he could not fix it, or make it better. It is the second time in his life he cannot fix something, and death is the cause again._

_Letting out one last ragged breath, he released all of his sorrows, the toils of his life as a warrior, his deepest regrets, his pride, and his dignity._

_The last vision his eyes see in Soul Society is the image of his lieutenant and his little sister defeated among the ruins of the city he promised to defend with his life._

_His soul shattered, along with his sword._

_Kuchiki Byakuya's last thought was an apology, for everything._

'_I am sorry.'_

_He felt one last harsh pain as Senbonzakura slammed him against the wall, and then there was nothing._

* * *

_It is said that a baby's first moments of creation in the womb are the most peaceful, serene months that it will ever experience. Much like an infant, there was nothing but silence, and a comforting darkness that beckoned a great nothingness._

_At that moment, Byakuya, cold, alone, and utterly broken, lay in a heap of nothing, as nothing. At one point, his empty gaze rose up, and a soul exuding gentleness met his sight. In front of him, an ethereal being taking light off of all of this madness and despair, lifted widening arms which suddenly seemed to surround him, and take him in. All of the broken pieces of his body and soul were absorbed in her knowing and celestial gaze._

_Hisana's eyes are large and loving, as they always were in recollected memory, and in them spoke every word that need not be said. Byakuya accepted them, and couldn't look away, before he at last heard her heavenly voice._

"_Thank you."_

_He immediately breaks down in audible sobs; his eyes close in sorrow and weariness, as Byakuya is exposed completely in front of her._

_Peace…a calming serenity enfolds him; a smiling angel wraps her arms around him in a forgiving embrace. It was time._

_And Byakuya felt whole again._


End file.
